Pardon Me: Pardon my dramatic anger. When I make an appointment with someone at 9:30 then I expect to be seen within 10 minutes of 9:30. I can't tell you how many times we will take Nathan to a Doctor's appointment and we get there 10 minutes early like we're supposed to and then aren't seen until 30 minutes after his appointment time. If Nathan were a layed back easily entertained kid then it might be a little different but he's very active and likes to go. Asking him to wait that long just isn't fair for him.

But it happens to me when I'm by myself. I made an 11 am appointment to have my new car stereo installed. I walk in at 11 an there is no one in the bay. After I wait for 10 minutes to show up I go to the front of the store and they tell me someone should be back there. This is when I want to say "I'm sure they should be back there but they aren't".

But seriously a little bit more respect of appointments would be great.

Invincible: Heather and I went to a movie last night. It's called a cinema cafe and for those who might not know what that is, it's a movie theater with tables and chairs rather than theater seats and they serve food...and bring it right to you. I assume other places in the country have them but we seem to have a few more than usual around this area.

We were dropping Nathan off at my moms and at my moms house ran into one of our friends that we've met through my mom. She said she had coupons and offered them to us. So...with coupons we enjoyed free admission, a buy one get one free meal and a free large popcorn. We walked away winner and enjoyed night out on mostly coupons.

The movie...one of the best I've seen in a while. In a way it's a classic disney sports movie like Miracle or Remember the Titans but in another way do those feel good sports stories every grow old?

The only problem is that the movie features the Philadelphia Eagles and that's just immoral!

Mockingbird: Derek Webb is giving away copies of his cd mockingbird at www.freederekwebb.com. You have to submit 5 of your friends email addresses but it's a free music download of a very inspired album.

Ernesto: We are now getting our version of Hurricane Ernesto which means rain, some light winds and depending on the tides, flooding. As Robbie and I decided last night it's hard to take a Hurricane named Ernesto seriously.

Backpack: When I was a young teenager I was at my friends house and we started watching this movie. The lead actor was in really good shape and every morning he would get up and put on a backpack and would go for a run. The crazy thing is that the backpack was filled with bricks. So every morning this guy would get up and put on a backpack filled with bricks and go for a run. He was tough. Sometimes he would add bricks because it wasn't heavy enough but he never took out bricks, only added them.

Then one morning he takes his brick filled backpack and forget to look both ways as he crosses the street and WHACK he gets hit by a car. He is paralyzed from the waist down or maybe from the neck down...I don't remember. Then I think there was something about a white faced monkey...it was a long time ago.

Sometimes I get to feeling real responsible for life. I feel responsible for The Bridge Church and guaranteeing success for the church. I feel responsible to change people's lives to connect people to God. I think on the surface those are pretty good things to feel responsible for and sometimes it is. But then I get to feeling too responsible and rather than conduit or a vessel of these things I must be the initiator and creator of these things. I assume the role of God. I remove God from his throne in my life and in other's lives and I feel responsible to take over. I put on my brick filled backpack, which as illustrated by the guy in the movie probably isn't such a good idea. I might get attacked by monkeys.

The backpack isn't mine and it's a ridiclous burden to think I can carry. It will go on for a few days and I start getting tired and I feel these bricks jabbing into my back and I start thinking all this work just isn't fair and this responsiblity just isn't good. Then I realize I'm carrying that darn backpack again and I ask God to take it off of me and to carry it for me.

Taking the pack off is generally harder than putting it on. God gives his grace though and he's carrying it again for me.

Way Off: You know I don't think I've ever had anyone tell me when I shared with them a new thought I've had "Nick, You're way off!" Even in a bible study sometime someone will share something (is that ambigious or what?) and what they share will be so off kilter and wack I barely contain my facial expression and I'll try to gently try to help them refocus their thought but I've never told someone straight out that they were way off and living poor theology and had a wrong view of God. Not saying I'll start I just wonder if there's a place for that.

Plan B further thoughts on faith: I finished the book and as I was reading it I would wonder why I was still reading it and I concluded that I wanted to finish so I could fell justified when I wrote this blog entry. I think Anne Lamott is a very creative, endearing and interesting writer. I really do enjoy her writing style but not so much her content. Maybe it's because she's west coast and I'm east coast. Maybe I'm just not hippie, left, or pessimistic enough to get it this time. But honestly I don't live in the sky is falling world she lives in. Life is just not that bad for me. I do value her consistent idea that God brings hope and that God uses mankind to be instruments of hope in this dark world. I agree with that.

There were certainly other truths I got from her book. For instance she talks about how she talks to her son and how nasty she can be with him and him with her. She says that she talks with him that way because...she can. That got me thinking about how family will treat family sometime. How the ones we spend the most time with and the ones we love the most can be the ones we treat the worst. We do it because, like Anne says, we can. We talk to a stranger that way and they would punch us in the face but we talk to our children that way and they have no choice but to take it. The thought has stayed with me and I want to learn from it. I want to treat my family better than I treat perfect strangers.

Nathan Son: Heather and I took a day off yesterday and went up to a state park about an hour from our house. It's right on the river so there is a beach and the river is huge so the water is calm and shallow. Nathan played in the water, I went fishing and we had a great time. It's amazing how much Nathan already wants to do what I'm doing. When I was fishing he wasn't happy until Heather made him a fishing pole from a stick complete with line and a bobber.

Last night I was playing with Nathan and I threw some folded socks at him. Well he smiled and threw what he was holding at me. Which happened to be his drink. Oops.

Back to School: Yesterday in Kempton Park we hosted a back to school party for our neighborhood kids. We were joined by New Hope Christian Fellowship (Va Beach) and they helped us set up, run the games, and clean up afterwards. We used the pool area and had registration, craft, photo area, games, snack and checkout which awarded prizes for "bridge bucks" that were won playing the games. The kids played the games and cashed in their bucks for really cool school supplies. We had great attendance despite the sweltering heat and all of the kids and parents had a great time. We made good contact with our neighbors and will be following up with this this week about The Bridge and how they can join us.



This is our photo area which our resident interior decorator, Kristina, decorated. It looks great!

Sunday: Sunday afternoon and it's almost 1. We hit the early service at one of my friend's church and we've been home more than 2 hours now. I'm preparing for my fantasy football draft tonight and throwing down a little blog entry.

Love: I been told twice this week that it's apparent how much I love God and the way I live seems to inspire others to desire a better relationship with Christ. I hope this confession is appropriate. I really do love God but honestly I'm not sure how much that matters. What matters is how much God loves me. I'm sure it's not a popular thought but sometimes I follow Christ out of obligation. That might not sound romantic, or lovely or even desirable but it's the truth. I do love God and there are times in my walk with him that I feel God but sometimes...like right now in my life, I don't feel very close to him. Nothing changed, no sin, not even apathy, I'm laboring for the gospel day in and day out and I don't feel God.

But I believe growth is developed in the valleys and the not feeling very close to God is one of the ways we experience the valley.

Prayer: Heather and I pray before every meal and that includes us holding hands across the table and praying for our food. Nathan normally gets quiet but doesn't pray and every now and again he'll want to hold hands with us.

Yesterday we were eating Chickfila at the mall and we prayed like normal. About halfway through the meal Nathan reached for both of our hands and he quickly bowed his head, shut his eyes real tight and said a few words. What he said we have no idea but he said his first prayer. Then for dinner he did it again. It's his new trick and it's funny as heck. He shuts his eyes real tight and says a few words. His prayers are about as long as mine, 2.5 seconds.

Friends: It's nice to hear from old friends, especially old friends that have been reading my blog. So shout out to Phil Horner- Press on!

Ask for Help: I'm not an ask for help person by nature, I'm assuming most guys aren't. But I've learned to ask for help. I mean for heavy lifting and moving I'm quick to ask for help but say audio set up or electronics "I got this yo". But I'm finding somethings are much quicker when you ask for help especially if you've never done it before. So just today I called up a friend from my old youth group who has experience in sound and he talked me through the set up process for the sound equipment I need to use tomorrow. Thanks Jon, baby huey, sloth, super sloth, super duper, you're the best!

Back to School: No, not me, at least not yet. But we're hosting a back to school party for our neighborhood tomorrow. This is our first preview event and we are previewing children's ministry and community. It's going to be a great day and I'll have pictures by monday.

Books: Two new books to comment on. I finished reading the first and am currently reading the second.

Communicating for a Change by Andy Stanley and Lane Jones- I'm not sure Andy Stanley can write a bad book and I'm fairly certain it's because he has surrounded himself by a team of people that are exceptional and they contribute mightly to his success. This book is a great book and I'll even call it a must read for communicators in the church. Lately I have been pondering and kind of exploring the idea of communicating from the pulpit. Mostly I have been aware of the drastic difference in the types of speaking I've been doing lately. In the past few months I have spoken at a 400 person youth retreat, I've spoken in churches to fundraise, I've spoken in churches in the traditional preaching mode, I've lead group devotionals and I've done little 10 minute blips at a informal beach retreat.

I want to be an excellent communitor. I want to be one of the best and I've decide that I'm willing to make this a goal and work on it.

Because of this I've been listening to communicators that I've found effective and I determine their effectiveness by how much I'm impacted by their messages. I also listen to young and upcoming communicators to hear them to be impacted but also to tune my ear to what might be annoying or ineffective that they do that I probably do. But basically I could flounder in the dark on this quest for the next 15 years...

and I still might. But this book, Communicating for a Change, is a great tool to help me on my way. Andy Stanley is one of my favorites and I highly value what he says, in spoken and written word. If you are a communicator buy this book, if you desire to be a communicator one day or get a shot every now and again at this pulpit then buy this book.

Plan B- Further thoughts on Faith by Anne Lamott- let me say I really liked her previous book Travelling Mercies. It came at a good time in my life. So perhaps this books timing just isn't right or perhaps its her incessant whining about George W. Bush. I'm on chapter 7 and she has mentioned once per chapter that the president has ruined her life, thrown her into a depression, or caused her to not want to live anymore. Suck it up cream puff. I mean seriously I'm not a real big fan of our boy George right now but when politics can have so much control over your life I think you need to reevaluate life. Step back and take a long hard look. But then again it's fun to be popular and it's fun to say cynical and popular things. But Anne is bigger than that, or so I thought.

Which leads me to my weekly left/right conversation...

I've heard it say if you're not a liberal in your 20's you have no heart, and if you're not a conservative by the time you're 50 you have no brain.

Theology: Theo- of or relating to God or deities. Logy- dull and heavy in motion or thought; sluggish. (I know it really means "study of" but this definition is real and seems a bit more appropriate right now in my life). This whole emergent thing I'm largely able to ignore. Rarely is it showing it's head and while I think we see characterisitics of it in life especially in the under 30 crowd it is still largely...not relevant. Here's why I say this. I'm not an opponent of Emergent and for a while I took a long hard look at it and I ran with the pack of emergent theology, I read some books, I tasted the bait. Now I've back off a little, not as an opponent but not as a buyer either.

As I understand it people want to follow someone who stands for something. They want a leader that is...a leader. They want someone to tell them everything is going to be ok and if it's not going to be ok then that's ok, life will go on. People want answers more than questions. They want to know how to be holy and what to do to hear from God. Taken to an extreme this is dangerous but handled correctly and biblically I don't think this is wrong at all. Afterall Jesus did tell his disciples everything would be ok, but not in the ok they originally thought. Jesus ok not disciple ok.

God is mysterious and following him sure does seem like a paradox a bit more often that I'm comfortable with but we aren't left out here without answers. We aren't on a mystical journey through the fog, we are on a tough journey through the valley. Our destination is clear and our objective is clear.

This is all a semi-reaction to some stuff I've been reading and hearing so to most observers I'm just ranting an answer that noone is asking...I'll do more to clarify later.

Vietnam Wall: This memorial continues to be my favorite. I think that's too much of a positive word for such a sombering monument so perhaps I should say it contines to be the monument that stirs my heart the most. It's not fancy, just a list of names of those dead, but more than that I think it's the things left at the wall. I only know about Vietnam what I've read or seen in movies and tv shows. But I can still feel the pain when I visit and I can see the sense of loss and remorse from soldiers both past and present.

We were involved in conflict in Vietnam for 16 years, I'm sure the casualties didn't seem like more than a few thousand those first few years but before they knew it the numbers totalled in the tens of thousands and then finally equalling almost 60,000.

2604 American's killied in action in Iraq as of August 18, 2006.

Trip: Here's a little photo blog of baseball extravaganza 2006. It was much fun spending the weekend with Robbie, Brandon, and BJ.



This was stop number 1- RFK Stadium in Washington, DC. The Nats got beat in a 4 hit shutout loosing to Atlanta 5 to 0. RFK is a dump but the Nats are my team so I had a good time...and thanks to Byron (formerly known as BJ) I got a free pencil set to commemorate the event.



The fellas at the game.



This was the next stop, DC at night. We walked from the Smithsonian metro stop to the Lincoln Monument to the White house to our hotel up on Thomas Circle. It was quite the hike but I got to see my favorite monument, The Vietnam Wall. I think I'll post a separate blog entry for this.



Tomb of the unknown soldier. It has been guarded 24 hours a day since 1930. The guard must be between 5'10"-6'4" and his waist no larger than 30", they take 21 steps and pause for 21 seconds. Their first 6 months of service they can't speak or watch tv. To wear the honor guard pen they cannot drink alcohol or swear in public for the rest of their life. Wow!




I liked this picture of me. I'm giving my pope blessing to the masses!



This is Camden Yards. Baltimore won 7-2 and we saw a few homeruns jacked, it was great. Camden is a great ballpark and I think rivals any in the country.



Baltimore inner harbor at night.



If you look very closely you can see it. There is a tv taped between the two front seats. I'm talking about a 13" regular plug in tv taped between two seats.

Here they all are thrown together.

the last few days have been crazy, crazy excellent but crazy all the same tomorrow marks the start of baseball extravaganza two major league cities in one sweet trip my only regret is that all the guys from the bridge won't be coming with us but i know we'll do it again nathan rode a motorized scooter today as well as a motorcycle not bad for a 17 month old i'm going to start a new blog to attach to our website when i get back from basefest

i think that's all for now

cerda out

Preacher: I wanted to give a brief comment on a man that passed away early Thursday morning, Rev. Earl Freeland. Rev. Freeland was the first pastor that I had and while I was only 7 years old when he retired I still can remember some of the stories he told during his sermons. He is the man that performed the ceremony for my sister's wedding. More importantly it was his sermon 21 years ago that the Holy Spirit used to stir my heart and that night I prayed to Christ and told him to be Lord of my life...He took me up on the offer!

But probably even more important than that, Rev. Freeland was the pastor of the church when my mom first went to church in her high school years. And he is the reason mom clung so hard to The Alliance Church and why my sister, my brother, and I were raised in the church. He is probably the reason why all 3 of us profess Jesus Christ as Lord, which gave us great peace during the time of my brother's death more than 2 years ago now.

Preacher Freeland, as we called him, was a MAN in the pulpit and his charisma and passion for the word of God really played an instrumental role in my life and my calling to be a pastor/preacher/ or whatever the heck people want to call me. There are few in the world I might have more respect for than Rev. Earl Freeland, for now and for the rest of my life.

Distribution-Success: We distributed over 4000 pieces to our surrounding neighbors. The Students were excellent help and they really made the whole weekend a success. On Friday night they gave an hour of their time to help us stuff packets, which can seem to be an endless and thankless job. Then on Saturday morning after a quick briefing on what we would be doing we hit the neighborhoods. In under 2 hours we distributed ot well over 4000 homes and from what I could see and heard there were lots of positive contacts made. Conversations were had and smiles exchanged, it was a great day for distributing the name and efforts of The Bridge Church.

Weather: the weather has been amazing here the last few days. Warm, even hot, during the day but cool and comfortable at night. I love it.

Baseball: This Thursday some of the guys and I are heading up to DC to watch the Nationals play the Braves. That's a 1pm game. After that's over we'll do the tourists tour of DC and then on Friday night we're going to see the Orioles play the Blute Jays. 4 major league teams in 2 seperate major league cities in 2 days. It's going to be a great time.

Report: I'm please to report that 1500 packets are now put together and ready to go, including our special Kempton Park pieces. I'm in the home stretch of the printing and will take them to get folded later this morning.

I have to tell you this mailer has been good for me. Up until now talk of planting this church has been just that talk. I mean we've been casting our vision and peddling our cause for over 7 months now and gathering people to this cause. But last night was when the reality his that we have some hard work ahead of us. I know we've been preparing for it, I know we're ready for it but it's still a reality check.

And I want to send a thanks to Heather ;), Kristy, Mark, Maylene, Randi, Robbie, and Jenni for sticking around an hour and some change when I know you all were tired to stuff those packets. You're the best!

Cerda Printing Company: No job too small, no job too large except possibly this one. Change of plans today put me printing 5000 letters. I estimate I can print 1 page every 6 seconds, 10 pages a minute, 600 pages an hour. So it should only take me 8.33 hours to print this 5000 piece monstrosity.

World Trade Center: I've known this was coming out for some time but have succeeded in ignoring it until now. I suppose I could rant, like I did with Flight 93, that it's just to early for a movie. We're not even quite 5 years removed yet. I could also rant that this type of event is not to be for our entertainment so soon after. I mean it took almost 10 years to start movies on the first gulf war and that was thousands of miles away.

But I think what I'll rant about is this...do we need a movie? Is there anyone that was of adult age that doesn't remember exactly where they were when they saw or hear the news? Is there anyone that doesn't remember how they cried in fear, in anger, in the fact that they knew they were witnessing a tragedy of a magnitude that few events in history could rival? Is there anyone that didn't know that from now on things would just be different? I don't need a movie that's for sure- so in my silent protest I won't watch it just like I didn't watch Flight 93...

Oh and another thing...it's only rated pg-13...if any movie, any movie ever made could justify being rated R it would be this movie but...rated R movies don't make the money that pg-13 movies do.

Maurice Clarett: Maurice, you have as much chance at an NFL career now as I do. You blew it you threw it away, you're a sad story I'll admit that...but to quote the movie Liar, Liar- quit breaking the law #$%^#@!

Need: I've felt the desire to blog for a few days now but seldom does this desire come while sitting in front of my computer screen.

Rehearsal: I was watching Ironman marathon, the thing where the people swim, bike and run amazing distances and live to tell about it. This one guy has ALS also known as Lou Gehrig disease and he competed. He will be dead in no more than 5 years and he's competing in Ironmans he also has written narative poetry and I'm not sure if this quote is his but one I remembered is...Life is not a dress rehearsal

Victory?: Heard a story...a church planter's boys go to school and they ask their teacher if they can pass out flyers for the church's VBS. The teacher told them that was against school policy and that no religious material was allowed. The boys were naturally upset and went home to their father. The father went to the principal and was told what the boys were told, that religious material was not allowed. The father, a church planter, called some christian organization and the organization had their attorney contact the school board and the boys were allowed to pass out flyers, because the law was unconstitutional. A big praise report was sent out.

I see two sides of this. I agree that laws should apply across the board no matter the religion, cause or effort and that includes allowing passing out of VBS material.

I also see how this was the absolute wrong way to approach this problem. Now I'm figuring that this teacher has a bad taste of these boys, their father (a pastor) not to mention the prinicpal's opinion of forcing this matter. They waged war and they won but what did they win?

Wash and Wax: I spent the morning washing the Accord and even pulled it into the garage for a coat of wax. I took off the wiper arms and spray painted them a flat black, the black had worn off and they were a very faded silver. Heather washed the other two vehicles (man I'm a slave driver!) mine needed to be washed so I could put it for sale and hers just needed a rinse off.

Car: I bought a car today. A 1995 Honda Accord with about 130k miles on it. In type that sounds like a beater but the car is in pristine condition and only owned by one other. I'm excited about it. A picture below.

No comment on the above picture except that I'll tell you I laughed when I saw it.

LiFE Group version 2.0: Tonight we enter into LiFE Group v. 2.0. We took about a month off from meeting for Bible Study and instead just met for fun. It gave me a nice 4 week break from preparing a study as well as some time to do some master planning for the remainder of the summer and the fall. Tonight we are going to start a new study that will run for 5 weeks with a get together at the end/beginning of v. 3.0 on September 7. This will be a get together to present the options for the fall as well as a chance for our new contacts to meet the LiFE groups leaders and the others that are committed and by the end of the night choose a LiFE Group to be part of.

*why am I so tempted to call them small groups? I don't particularly want them to be small but I want them to be growing and excellent.

Extravaganza: Last night I went with Brandon to hang out with some of his high school buddies. We had a 2 and a half hour Crazy Wing Extravanganza where 8 dozen wings were consumed. It was fun and there were wings...is there anything else greater in life? I'm actually hoping to make a monday or tuesday night once or twice a month a wing/dude's night for our men's meeting.

Deuce: I preached at Staunton Alliance Church today in Staunton, VA. Heather and I drop up last night and Nathan stayed with my mom. I preached at the 8:30 service and then at the 11:00 service. This was the first time that I have ever taught twice in the same day. I did the same sermon since there would be minimal overlap and I must say I improved the second time. I learned something, I feel I made an impact so it was a good day. Now I'm dog tired from preaching twice and driving the 3.5 hours home but I'll make it.

Torture: One of my good friends from college used to sit around and develop ways to conquer the world. It was a sort of Pinky and the Brain but it was Chris and Nick and Richard. The latter of the two playing a non strategic role. Chris would come up with forms of torture. One of which was to put two guys in a room together and the first one to bite the others lips off was allowed to live and the other...well he had his lips bitten off and they both had to live with the humilitation of being that close to another man's lips.

The other form of torture that I thought was blog worthy was to put a person in a round padded room and make them listen to Lisa Loeb non stop. Possibly to Chris' chagrin I have to confess that I now have a Lisa Loeb song on my ipod...and I like it.

Sorry buddy!

Went fishing: I went fishing this morning. I noticed how it's called fishing and not catching. If it was called catching people would actually catch something but since it's just called fishing it's a lot like hoping but with a rod and reel. But as I was leaving the old guy that runs the bait shop asked with a smug grin, "catch anything?" when he could clearly see I was carrying no fish...smart alek old fart...I replied "I didn't come to catch anything I just game to fish". He got a good laugh out of that and we said our goodbyes. So my fishing this morning was good. I was able to relax, let my mind wander, and get some inner peace. Refreshing.

Life is hard, wear a helmet



Being Green: We've started recyclying, I subscribe to National Geographic and I'm seriously considering buying a vehicle that will improve my gas mileage by 20 mpg, so while I'm no tree hugging hippie I'm becoming a little more green that I used to be. I figure when it all goes down and global warming melts all the ice caps and I have beach front property and get ravaged by tidal flooding and hurricanes I can pass the blame on to someone else. So really all my new found environmental actions are to avoid fault...interesting.

Seriously though, I wonder how much junk mail I throw away on any given week. It seems like every day I get about 4-8 pieces of junk mail. That's a lot of waste all for stuff I seldom open. Is there something that can be done?

500th Post: Oh yeah I hit my 500th post a on my last post. I was going to zip by it without a pause but I second thought that and felt it worth mentioning.

What Else: There's been a good bit going on but right now on this lazy Sunday afternoon just doesn't feel like the time to blog on it all. Who knows though the more I type the better I might feel about writing it all down.

Blue Grass: Last night we bluegrassed it up down at Chesapeake Park with some friends. Bluegrass playing in the background the ladies talking, the kid running amuck and the guys throwing the football. It was pretty much the perfect summer night.

Month Ahead: I got approval to use both the neighborhood pool area as well as Bennett's Creek park for our School Opening Festival. We're going to use our pool area. The party will be just for the our neighborhood kids and we're celebrating the opening of our new 800 student elementary school. The school is going to be a beauty and will also be what I believe to be a turning point in the previously poor Suffolk Public Schools. I'v been in contact with the Administration with the school and we're meeting later this week to talk about the Creekside/Bridge Church partnership.

The part will feature some grade level competition, individual games, a photo booth, as well as prices and get to meet the prinicpal time. We, of course, are going to use this time to meet out neighbors, get our church out there and show people that we value children and what our children's ministry will be like. I'm so excited!

Beach Bash: August 12 the teenagers of the Mid-Atlantic District of the C&MA are sacrificing a few of their hours on the beach to help out The Bridge Church. We're going to distribute 5,000 door hangers/post cards. With all that man power it's cost effective and too great an opportunity to pass up. That day we'll also host a few mini festivals for children at local parks with balloons and temporary tattoos.

Pastors: If you are a pastor and keep up with my blog please read this and take it to heart. My wife and I walked into a church today with our son Nathan. Nathan was walking and him being only 17 months he walks pretty slowly. We walked by 3 men at the outside door, they were talking we didn't receive a wave, smile or even glance. We walked into the foyer and just sort of waited to be greeted. After it was obvious that wasn't going to happen we proceeded to find the nursery. There were no signs no directions and no greeters to point us the way. We finally found the nursery and once again were left to guess what we should do. Basically this goes on and on and after the service when we left only 3 people had met us and knew our names and 0 people knew anything more than our names.

Sing: Girl beside me is singing pretty loudly in starbucks. She has headphones on so she doesn't know how loud she's singing. The singing is pretty much the worst I've ever heard. YIKES!

Update: it just got louder, laughter is imminent.

ok she just left- laughter averted.

Dear MySpace User: I know you might think it's cool to take a picture of yourself and then post it of yourself but really it's not. Find a friend have them take a picture, it looks much better.

Love Me: I read this online this morning that 212 Million Americans have cell phone and this entire article is about cell phone addictions.

I heard a song that says you're nobody till somebody loves you by Dean Martin. When your cell phone rings it says I'm somebody and somebody thinks I'm important. Listen to number 51.

Habitudes: I'm looking into Habitudes by Tim Elmore for a group study in the fall. I found it interesting that 64% of people that looked at Habitudes wound up buying Why men Hate going to church...

Warning: I like mullets, I don't have them so I must not like them that much but I think they are funny as heck. I take pictures of them, I laugh at people that have them. I have mullet spotters all over the world and they update me on sweet mullets they have seen. So far my mullet fan club has been for humor purposes only but I think I have discovered an actual use for mullet spotting?

Ever seen COPS the tv show? Ever notice how most of the criminals on there have mullets? Now don't jump to conclusions but you see where I'm going with this. I've also heard it rumored that Usama Bin Laden has a mullet under his turban. Oh and by the way I noticed that Bin Laden is number 2 on the fbi's most wanted list. http://www.fbi.gov/wanted/topten/fugitives/fugitives.htm

12%: I heard a stat the other day that said 12% of Americans read books on a regular basis.

It'll be ok: We teach about Jesus and we say "Jesus is going to make everything ok...I'm starting to think he isn't." -Don Miller at Catalyst Unplugged.

Captain America: I served as the program director of Summit Grove Campt in New Freedom, PA last week. I'll comment more about how the week wnt. I definately enjoyed it and the week of service served me than required me to serve. But perhaps the general highlight of th week was this. I was about to go up to do a general introduction of myself, I hadn't met many of the counselors and none of the students. I was thinking about what I would say and figured that it'd be pretty boring for me to stand up there and say "Hi, I'm Nick, I'm your camp director this week, love me." So instead I stood up there and said "Hi my name's Nick but people call me Captain America, welcome to Summit Grove Camp". So for the past week my name has been Captain America.

Sabbath: Sabbath is the new buzz word in the church particularly with Gen X-Mosaics so I don't mean to jump on this band wagon. I was driving up on Sunday and I listened to a few of the Catalyst Podcasts and the people talking kept brining up Sabbath and being the new buzz word I was just sort of ignoring the word but trying to grasp the concept but like fasting I figure it would be something that led to frustration not freedom in Christ or connection to him. But this week while I was serving I was being served. I forgot the power cord to my compy, I wasn't dependent on my ipod, I didn't read, I didn't feel pressured to work, I just work with the students and counselors. I hung out with my friends, I had a good time. Most of all I unplugged, whether intentional or not I unplugged from my computer and my regular life and it was sabbath. Not planned but great.

I won't even put a title on this. I'm sitting here in the middle of a field on a picnic table at Summit Grove Camp in New Freedom, PA. The breeze is cool this morning and any idea of a rant that I had has left me and I'm just enjoying the cool breeze, the slight smell of skunk in the air and the fact that by driving a mere 5 hours last night I have escaped into another world where church planting is what I do and not who I am. It's been fun sharing with friends what we've been up to and what's even more fun is telling them what we're going to be doing these next couple months. I know I'm going to be tired at the end of this week of working a jr. high camp but I also know I'm going to be refreshed. I've asked God to meet me here this week not that I deserve it but because he give his children good gifts.

Habitudes: I had never heard of this guy or the ministry before but I highly recommend it after hearing a cd of the catalyst lab I purchased last October. Check out his website here->www.growingleaders.com or go straight to the store and cash in on the 3 Habitudes books for only $27 bucks. I'm pretty sure they're going to be worth it.
online store: www.growingleaders.com/store_intro.php

Learn: I really learned a lot yesterday driving up here. I took advantage of my time alone in the car and took the time to listen to some stuff I had on cd and my ipod. I had mostly labs from Catalyst but also a few sermons from Rob Bell, one of my favorite communicators. It was a good trip and despite the trafic I actually enjoyed it.

Watah: Last night, 4th of July. I took 50 bottles on ice down to Portsmouth waterside where we'd watch the fireworks. I seriously had my doubts if I could get rid of 50 bottles of water in the 45 minutes we had before the fireworks. Rob and I started offering free water and in only a matter of about 10 minutes we had disributed all of our water. It was a great first run for the Street Team and I wanted it to be a test of possible future events and it did seem to generate about 15 hits on our website from the time we got home last night and this morning at 9am.

Superman Returns: We saw Superman Returns yesterday. The end.

Street Team: Nathan and I are going to head out to the 4th of July fireworks on Tuesday night on our first ever "street team" venture. We're just going to have some water bottles to hand out and keep it simple for this first shot. I'm going to make us some iron on t-shirts that we'll wear to let people know who we are. I'll post some pictures after the fact. It will be simple but I know it's a great first step for us and I know we'll get meet lots of new people and show Christ's love in the process!

Blender: Mom walks into Starbucks today with her 2 or 3 year old girl. The girl is being held by her mom and they are talking. As the mom approaches the counter the girl screams like she is being killed. The mom walks quickly to the door and I hear her say "It's ok the blender won't hurt you."

True Story

Tell em...: "Tell em your granddad knows Al King, then he'll take care of you." -Granddad

Score: I'm currently making copies of a book on cd because there is no way I could get them ordered and sent to me in time for them to make a difference. Probably like every other book study in the history of the world the people involved in our wednesday night PDL book study aren't getting read the material in time for wednesday nights or they aren't even trying. But I don't feel back or take it personally and I don't take them on guilt trips or try to coerce them into reading the material. I know better than that.

Today I saw my buddy Brandon at the gym and was telling him I had a hard time getting through the material and I'm tired of reading it so instead I listened to it from the book on cd that someone gave me long ago. He told me the was tired of reading it also. Surveys say that most men don't like to read. The reason men don't like to read is that men generally aren't very good at reading. They...um wait...we like to hunt and fish and work on computers and do other hands on stuff but generally not read. I like reading, I'm not normal but I've known that since the 1st grade. So not all men fit the stereotype but in general men don't like to read...

So I'm going to make copies until I can order some for everyone- crisis averted.

But that got me thinking that perhaps my thinking is messed up. Generally one would think that reading the material before hand like requested shows participation and effort but our discussions were some of the best our little group has ever had. So it was clear people were excited about the material but weren't making time to read it. I was keeping score the wrong way. The better way to have kept score would be to see if people are processing the material and allowing it to penetrate their lives.

Which makes me wonder what other things do we need to reevaluate how we are keeping score?

Currently Reading: I'm currently reading Why Men Hate Going to Church by David Murrow. Considering it is a book I bought because I was attracted by it's title and cover this book has turned out surprisingly insightful and thought provoking. I think what it is more than anything is unique. Afteralll it seems to be the first book written of it's kind and while someone could have written "why atheists hate going to church" or "why earthworms don't go to church" this title had much more ammunition.

He shows some very interesting points just analyzing the behavior and science of men and then what is happening in our churches. Contrary to what Dan Brown says in the DaVinci Code the church IS mostly feminine with feminine behaviors. Ironically I laugh at some of what he is critiquing becuase like him and other men I remember struggling with the "gayness" of church but I suppose over time I got used to it.

Two Cerda thumbs up for the book though...

Rain: We've been getting rain around here like crazy. The first 5 months of the year I think it rained only a half dozen times but since the beginning of June it's been raining almost every other day and I think today is the 5th day in a row it's rained and the past few days have been quite a large amount...and lightning just knocked the power out...again.

Launch Team: Last night was our first ever Launch Team meeting. It was a great night with people that enjoy each other and are committed to making this church a success. We talked about vision for a while and then about the gritty details that need to get done between now and February 11, 2007. That aspect is one of the duties I enjoy the most but can be the most frustrating. It's my favorite when a great thing comes together and I loathe it when I've got writers block.

Money: It used to drive me crazy the way my former ministry dealt with money but more specifically people's contributions to the church. It was this top secret hush hush thing about who gave, who didn't give. How much people gave was a highly kept secret... I used to get frustrated because we would sit around board meetings talking about bad off the church was and how we could barely pay the bills and at one point the treasurer started asking me to hold onto my paychecks till he could make the deposit because there wasn't enough money in the bank to pay me. But while budget weren't being met and ministries were suffering no one was ever asking the obvious question- are people giving their financial resources to the church? It was never asked because certain people knew the answer and then consequence to that question. That no indeed most people were not giving and that something needed to be done about that.

As a church planter I'm pretty darn aware of money. I've set out to raise $24k for the church plant this year and Heather and I give our tithe money to the church plant. I'm also aware that I'm gathering a launch team and that I need to at some point ask them to begin contributing to the church. The bible tells us where our treasure is there will our heart be also. In my language that says people give money to what they think is important.

So last night at the launch team meeting I knew I needed to mention giving to the church. I didn't have anyone in mind that needs to start giving or they are going to spend longer in purgatory but I did give an invite to our Launch Team to start giving to the church. I have to admit again it was hard to say, these people are my friends and I don't want to convince or coerce them into giving but I felt it was more than appropriate to invite them to give. At the end of the night someone asked me how they could start giving...amen!

Blog Rules: I saw some where that there are rules for blogging like you shoudl categorize your blogs so they are easily organized and that you should only blog about the same topics. well like with other things in life I have broken the rules. I'm not really sure what this blog about or who it's even for. I do know that people read it if not many and I hope that it's at least enjoyable if not challenging. I suppose untimately I'd keep it even if no one read it. On a statistical note I've been keeping this blog for two years now and am approaching my 500th post.

Launch Team Meeting: Our first launch team meeting is this Sunday, June 25. On Wednesday at Starbucks after our book discussion coversation turned to the future, our goals and purpose and it was not only encouraging but exciting. So I'm hoping Sunday is the same way and I'm praying God really gives us clean directions for the future of The Bridge Church.

An article I wrote for a denomination newsletter.

My father was in the Navy for 29 years. This meant frequent and sometimes long deployments where he could not be around very much. I didn’t have as much time with my father as other kids my age did but I also valued the time and the things he taught me more than other kids my age. When I was thirteen my dad came home with a small slip of paper that had a quote on it from a book he was reading. Dad told me that he wanted me to have the quote and he encouraged me to live by the words it contained.

Over the years I kept the paper in my wallet and would come across it at oddly appropriate times. Finally the paper became so worn I had to remove it from my wallet, hoping to salvage it in a keepsake box but realizing it would never make it I threw it away. It didn’t matter though. The words that the unevenly cut piece of paper contained had long been imprinted on my mind and had worked their way into my heart and often pervaded my thinking.

The quote has many variations but this is the one my father gave me: Far better is it to dare mighty things to win glorious triumphs and suffer much defeat than to live in the grey twilight where one does not suffer much nor enjoy much.

It’s better to go for something big, something impacting, and possibly (or even likely) fail than to play it safe. Because when you play it safe you may never have to suffer the agony of defeat but neither will you ever enjoy the exhilaration of victory.

Reggie McNeal states in his book The Present Future that just 4% of those born after 1976 consider themselves born again. I have quoted this statistic several times when speaking about church planting and have even heard it quoted from other’s pulpits. I was in conversation with a church worker a few weeks ago and he quoted me this statistic and I just smiled. I wondered if he even knew the source of the statistic, coming from Thom Rainer but quoted by Reggie McNeal. Regardless of the source or even its accuracy I have never heard this number argued.

A quick glance at the previous generations: Busters (born between 1965-1976) and Boomers (born between 1946-1965) claim 15% and 35% born again respectively. At this rate the children of the current generation will claim less than 1% born again! To some of us this statistic has become trite or perhaps so overbearing it’s less painful if we just ignore it. What’s much harder to ignore is when you see your children leave the church as they read adulthood, which is what we have seen and will continue to see unless something changes. I have never encountered a more fitting time to be called to action to “dare mighty things”.

This solution is not programmatic but quite pragmatic and likely will be problematic- but worth every effort. It is a mindset that must pervade our thinking if we hope to see the gospel of Jesus Christ thrive.

Jesus never promised his disciples an easy life instead he told them to leave and take no money. He warned them that people would reject them and not give them shelter. He called them sheep with no protector. He warned them that they would be flogged and hated for what they represented. He said that who ever finds his life will lose it and whoever loses his life will find it.

Maybe Jesus was just painting a worst-case scenario? Maybe not! Just read the book of Acts, it appears he was right about all of those things. Jesus was possibly the worst motivational speaker ever! He broke all the rules of discipleship and all the rules of rallying people to his cause yet he began the most successful movement in history with a handful of underdogs and saying things that were hard to hear.

Church has become a very comfortable thing for all of us ranging from paid staff to infrequent visitors. We are far removed from the days of dangerous Christianity, the Christianity that Jesus inspired and warned about to his first followers. We seldom blaze new paths or even try things that could possibly fail. We try so hard to minimize failure that we also eliminate any chance of success.

The call to church planting was incredibly frightening for Heather and I. It is easily something that could grip me with fear if I let it because the reality of the situation is that we might FAIL. Fortunately when we were faced with the decision to pursue a dangerous ministry God gave us the courage to go for it. Regularly I remember those warnings of Christ in Matthew 10 and I remember the quote my father gave me- the two go so well together!

Here we are in Suffolk not certain of success but certain that God delights in people willing to be adventurous to expand his kingdom. Let me encourage you to remember or perhaps discover for the first time the adventurous lifestyle you were called to when you signed on as a follower of Jesus Christ. Adventure is not just for church planters but for all followers of Christ. There is nothing safe in following Jesus Christ but there is much victory to be gained for those willing to step out and ask God for the victories while embracing and not fearing failure.

Honesty: We were talking at Stabucks last night for our Wednesday night group. I'm not really sure what brought us to it but we got to talking about the ways of God and frankly stuff that he does or has done that has disappoint us or pissed us off. I'm sure groups of Christians get together to do the same thing. Keep in mind we are all friends, and all believers and all honest. One of the guys starts sharing about what sparked his journey to the faith but then away from the faith. It was spoken in honesty and from the heart which I value more than any other attribute about a person. While talking he was honest about his disgust with God at times and even gave an hand gesture to mark the occasion in our minds forever. I couldn't help but chuckle at what people were seeing that might have been watching our group. But I couldn't help but be proud of our group being willing to be honest to each other and to God. You know I believe and I act as if God can handle my anger. He can handle me being upset with him and he can handle us forgetting that he is God in heaven and we are not or that we are the clay and he is the potter. But he is the God who allowed Jacob to wrestle him and win and the God that was willing to die on the cross for us so that we may live!

From Psalm 22
Yet you brought me out of the womb; you made me trust in you even when I was still nursing. From birth I was cast upon you; from my mother's womb you have been my God. Do not be far from me for trouble is near and there is no one to help. (New Cerda Version)

From Psalm 24
The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it; for he founded it upon the seas and established it upon the waters. Who may ascend the hill of the Lord? Who may stand in his holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his sould to an idol or swear by what is false. He will receive blessing from the Lord and vindication from God his savior. Such is the generation of those who seek him, who seek your face, O God of Jacob. (NIV)


¿Who may ascend the hill of the Lord?
¿Who may stand in his holy place?

This is one of those delayed blog entries. I’m sitting in Starbucks, the new one in Suffolk, and they don’t have wifi yet. I’m also assuming that this Starbucks will be a t-mobile hotspot which means it will cost money. It seems that my general hangout is the only Starbucks in the world that has free wifi…don’t tell anyone.

Fatherhood: Yesterday was my 2nd father’s day and two days before that my 5 year anniversary. I find it really incredible and a great privilege that I get to celebrate the two relationships that mean the most to me so close together.

Our anniversary went great. We went down to the beach and ate at Catch 31, where BJ works, and then we checked out the art festival taking place on the board walk and then went down to the water for a few minutes. Nathan liked the beach and wasn’t afraid of the water…he kept trying to run into the water by himself.

Yesterday we went to church and then took my dad out to lunch. Dad gave me a great little book by Tim Russert. He’s the guy that does Meet the Press and this is a 2nd book about fathers. I started reading it yesterday while Nathan and heather were getting some afternoon naps. I got a good way through it and it’s a great little book. Celebrating fathers’ and their positive influence on their kids. All of the stories are heartwarming and make you fell good about fathers. It’s a great gift especially from my father.

It’s interesting because I have been feeling a strong call of God to focus on the father relationship of God. Mainly to bring attention to it and to revel in the beauty of this relationship we have. So pure, so strong, so solid. Earthly fathers, even the best ones, make tragic and life altering mistakes when dealing with their children. John Eldgridge talks about this and is one of his primary focuses. He’s onto something. One thing that I value so much in my relationship with Nathan is the fact that I get to show to Nathan the father heart of God. That’s one of the roles God gives father’s, to show and display his love. One of the greatest hesistations of people in allowing God to have their hearts and lives is that the have a mistrust of father’s.

This whole theme fits in with another book I’m reading called Why men hate going to church. I think the title is funny and that’s why I bought the book. I think the author is onto something and basising his ideas on his opinion alone I have to say I like his opinion. He’s not saying anything new- just something seldom said.

God the Father…what does that mean? What should it mean?

Peanut Butter: I was on Nathan duty the other night so I figured we'd have peanut butter for dinner. I gave him a spoonful and he went for it then I decided I'd better give him some crackers to help wash it down. Viola'.

Quote: One of my players mom works for 106.9 the fox which is a classic rock station. She is part of the morning show. Someone was asking her about the upcoming Willie Nelson concert and if she'd be going. She says "I'm not going anywhere near that man, Willie Nelson is gross."

Tony Dungy head coach of the Colts speaks about the tragic loss of his son. written by one of my Around the Horn favorites, Michael Smith.

5: Tomorrow Heather and I have been married for 5 years. I can't express in words how much I love Heather and how great she is. She is the most unselfish person I know and anyone should be blessed to be able to call her friend. She is my best friend and closest companion and an incredible mother to our son, Nathan. Heather, I love you with all of my heart!

Kiss: I forgot about this until this morning and I'm not really sure what brought it up. I live very near my Grandparents and with my Grandma being almost 91 and Grandad trailing 10 years behind at almost 81 I figure I better get over to see them as frequently as I can manage. You have to understand my Grandad. He's from upstate New York but he swears he's never going back and he calls himself a damn yankee. He carries a gun all the time, even while cutting his grass, and he's a republican because they let you carry guns. He believes 9/11 was a government conspiracy. He loads his own ammo and tells me that if his house ever catches fire and I'm anywhere near it to just run. He also tells me that if we're ever attacked by another country or even our own we're to meet at his house and I'm to bring my guns. His nickname for me growing up was Porkchop and fathead. He has manuevers that can inflict pain on any child aged 2-99, they are known as the "one finger hurt" and the "ham". But one thing we always know about Grandad is that he'll do anything for us and he loves us very much.

So with all that said about my Grandad last time I was leaving his house he gave me a big hug..and he kissed me on the cheek.

Then on Saturday after the wedding I was officiating the grooms father who I know pretty welll gave me a big hug...and kissed me on the cheek. I was surprised but not bothered. It was a surprisingly appropriate thing to do. So there it is maybe the kiss is coming back.

Revolution: I just finished reading Revolution by George Barna. I wouldn't say it's one of the more life changing books I've read but it was interesting and sparked some interesting thought in my brain. It's ironic because I genuinely have a heart that is passionate about the Church of Jesus Christ. I recognize that this church is going to look different as time passes particularly with a mere 4% of our generation claiming to be born again. The idea of The Revolution that Barna has observed says that there is actually a moderately large group of people following the teachings of the bible, claiming Jesus Christ as Lord, and serving others with the love of Jesus Christ but not affiliated with any local body of believers.

One of my ministry friends here in Suffolk is a youth pastor at a fairly large Baptist church. Gary is a great guy whom I respect not just as a ministry partner but also sort of as an older ministry brother. He's wise, he thinks before he speaks and God is doing phenomenal work through him in his student ministry. I also have other ministry friends that are Baptist, Methodist, Presbyterian or whatever else denomination comes to mind. They value their denomination and are bonded to it. The reason I bring this up is because the idea of revolution and what it means for denominations is not encouraging. But what it means for the kingdom of God is very encouraging.

I'm left standing in the middle. I do not believe it is essential for a person to be a part of an organized local "church" but I do believe being a part of an organic body of believers is essential to spiritual growth. So catch the semantics the organized church is not always an organic body of believers but a social fraternity or a swell program for the kids.

The rub is, and why I brought up my Baptist friend in the first place is that people by nature are not disciplined. They go to work because they’ll get fired if they don’t and people in general stay healthy and lose weight because they don’t want to die at an early age. We drive the speed limit because we don’t want a ticket, etc, etc. So basically what I’m saying if left in our own depravity people will resist being in community. By removing the responsibility or obligation of going to church people will in turn stop being part of a community of believers. It’s that dichotomy of discipline and passionate love. In a perfect world we would all be in love with Jesus and his people and would love going to be part of our community groups but in reality we live in a fallen sinful world where in bursts we are in love and in bursts we despise the bondage of being bound in community. Our bondage is our liberation though and that’s the irony. When we bind ourselves to others we are in turn made free and are free to be who we are. (sounds like song lyrics brewing!)

Well I've sufficiently walked all over this one and all over the place in the process. So read the book it's worth the $10 and the 130 pages it's printed on. Even if you disagree...

0-3: Ouch! US loses to Czech. We actually got crushed. The best part of it for me was the fact that I was watching it in a sports bar with a bunch of other Americans. Americans excited about soccer- it was a neat feeling. I hope we do better against Italy on Saturday. I'll also be anxious to see how Brasil does tomorrow against Crotia. Because if Brasil isn't careful they are going to be upset by Czech in the tournament round. Netherlands looked good as well.

Truth: Truth be told I'm also rooting for Mexio in the cup.

Rolling: World Cup play has begun I was able to watch some of the first half of the Germany game yesterdy and am currently watching England and Paraguay. It's a great thing I tell you. Just being curious I wanted to see how much the WC official ball was...$130...holy crap!

But the matches are free so I'll stick with those.

Stuck: I just finished reading Between a rock and a hard place by Aron Ralston (google either). Most people are familar with his story if not his name. He is the guy that was hiking through a slot canyon when a large boulder fell on him and trapped his arm. Here he remained trapped for 5 days with minimal food and water. He had to resort to drinking his own urine. A hundred and some hours with no sleep and hypothermia threatening at night, the story is amazing.

I've got some quotes from the book that I might post in a few days- I'm just too lazy to go and find them right now.

Roll it back baby: Last night at Harbor Park was "roll back the clock night". Which means that hot dogs, drinks and popcorn were 25 cents each. It's a heck of a deal. We paid $8.50 for our tickets to watch the baseball game and then only a few bucks to eat like hot dog kings.

PDL: Tonight we are starting a book study at Starbucks from 8-9pm. The book is Purpose Driven Life and while I know it's dated I also know there are plenty of people wanting to read it that never go to it in the first place. I really have no idea what to expect and I was merely doing this out of obedience to what God was telling me to do. So I'm excited about tonight I know it will be good and just trusting him to bring out the right people.

Wedding: I will be officiating my first wedding. I woke up Sunday night at about 2 am and remembered I didn't have a suit to wear. So on monday I rushed around to a few suit places found someone with one I liked and made sure I could get it in time for not only the wedding but in time to leave for the wedding. The couple is one that I've known for about 4 and a half years now and I don't think I could ask for a better couple for my first wedding. They are very much in love and have been very wise in their relationship.

The comes up right as Heather and I are celebrating our 5 year anniversary. In many ways I can't believe it's been 5 years and then in others it feels every bit of 5 years (that's a good thing).

First of all: Hockey is still going on? I had no idea!

Wall: Our tournament is double elimination and we've already lost once so if we lose again we're out for the season. Tonight we played the Yankees and I'll spare the suspense- we won. Funny moment worth mentioning. Noah has been scared of the ball all year and I can't get him to pay attention on the bases, in other words it's pretty tough for me to play him in the infield. The problem is he's a smart kid and he knows that the infield is where the good kids play. Lately he's been doing well and is a lot less afraid of the ball. Still not ready for infield but doing much better. Well tonight was Noah's night because me in my moment of insanity and empathy I put him in at second base. Noah calls out to his mom "hey mom I'm playing second." "oh you're batting second?" "No I'm playing second base" Noah's mom says "Dear God..." and crosses herself as she speaks.

I'm not sure if my connection with Blogger is good right now so this entry might be a waste but we'll see. It's been a long weekend since I posted...

Too tight: Do you ever tie your shoes too tight? Generally I don't notice I've done this until I'm sitting in a tight place like an airplane or a cramped car. Then no matter how much I try to ignore it the cramped feeling comes over me and I can't sit still and start going crazy podering the whole time if this infact is what Hell might be like. I also figure that this is what it might be like to be stuck in a box without enough room like solitary confinement but not the american style the turkish prison style.

This is what it felt like to watch the Jennifer Aniston/Vince Vaughn movie The Break Up. I would actually prefer getting punched in the face a few times as opposed to having watch this movie ever again. It was horrendous! If you feel the need to waste $8 on this movie don't...if you still need to waste the $8 then you can send a check to my address- email for more information. nick@suffolk-bridge.org

Lost: Not the TV show but with the same result. After a rain out on Saturday and sitting in the BLAZING sun for 2 hours on sunday we finally played our first playoff game. The kids played ok but not as good as they can and they made some very critical errors at pretty much the worst possible time. But what was most discouraging them acting so poorly in the dugout. Stuff we've dealt with over and over and over again this season and they are still doing like spitting sunflower seeds at each other. My person favorite, waiting till someone spits a seed and then trying to run into it so you can tell on them. Playing in the dirt while at shortstop and the list goes on.

We play what might be our final game tonight. If we lose we're done for the season if we win we will play on Friday, frankly I just want our kids to play their best and to end the season on positive note whether that's win or lose.

Worry: While on vacation I really felt God talking to me about not worrying so much. I find this a reaccuring theme in my life but one that I don't mind working on. The worry was in regards to what God has called me to do and encouraging me to work but not worry at planting this church. God will provide and I will be faithful. The thought kept occuring that if it's all stripped away- all of it. I'll still be ok and even better than ok because I'll be a child of God.

Then as I'm thinking these thoughts and just exploring the divine process of not worrying about life we meet these people. They probably worried very little about life but with the abscense of worry didn't come freedom but it seemed like apathy. So I had to ask myself and God what the difference is. They aren't worried but they held jobs with minimal impact on the world, their whole goal in life was to stay alive and have as much fun as they can until they die. It was then that worry didn't seem like such a bad thing as long and I'm worried about the will of God and not the will of Nick.

So I'm not sure where I landed on all of this worry talk- i guess I won't worry about it.

Headphones: I often work at Starbucks, I enjoy the same wifi as I do at home and can work pretty much just the same. Generally I can work with very few distractions aside from the ones I enjoy like meeting people or drinking coffee. Sometimes though I'll put some music on either ipod or computer and enter into my own little world complete with sountrack.

Wearing headphones is funny for two reasons. The first is that people tend to stare more, I'm assuming this happens because they get confused and can't decipher if you're wearing blinders or headphones. The second reason I enjoy wearing them is because if there is someone sitting beside you having a conversation they will reserve what they say to whispers or avoid embarrassing situations but you put those headphones on they assume you're jamming you and they talk completely free about all of life's problems.

Fathom: You might have heard by now about this story. Our friend Kristy went to Taylor University and she told us a month or so ago about the awful accident that killed 5 students when a truck collided with their van. Among the survivors was a young woman that was in a coma and here family was caring for her at bedside. Yesterday they discovered that the daughter they were caring for wasn't their daughter at all but another young woman that was involved in the accident. Their daughter had been killed in the accident. Read the complete story here- no commentary will follow. Complete Story

Baseball: Last night was our last regular season game. It's hard to believe it's been three months since we started this thing. The other coaches and I were talking last night and we all agreed it's gone so fast. This has been a great season all of the coaches have gotten along great, the kids have learned so much and I believe I have the most respectful and well behaved teams in our league. All of our players are such good sports when we win and when we lose.

So last night our last regular season game against a team that we are way better than but have beat us as often as we've beaten them. The first four innings last night they had our number again. We kept it close but they were just beating us. We were making mental errors that we don't normally make and I thought we were in for a long night. The fifth inning comes and the score is 12-9 and we're loosing. We need at least 4 runs to win. I gather the team in and tell them we need to hit the ball and we need to score lots of runs. Well 20 minutes later the score is 22-12. We batted around the 12 man line up and every player on my team scored but one. The highlight had to be bases loaded and my best batter gets up to bat. He crushes a ball like I haven't seen crushed in our league as soon as he hit it I knew he had a triple but I was hoping he could go for the in the park homerun. He scored 3 runs on the triple and that's when the damage was too much for the other team to overcome. We had beat them to oblivion. They managed 1 run in the bottom of the 5th to make it 22-13 but they never stood another chance.

It was a great way to end our regular season and a great way to head into the tournament. I think we're going into the tournament a #2 seed in our division and #3 or 4 overall in the league. Not bad.

9-8 on the season...one game over .500.

Marker: Hand someone a 20 dollar bill at a store and more often than not they whip out one of those counterfeit identifier pens and put a mark on the bill you just handed them. As they make the mark I always hold my breath and feel like a criminal. I've never counterfeited a bill in my life and only, during the lean years, have I even entertained the thought. But send me to a grocery store with a 20 and I feel like an instant criminal. What if the mark deems my bill fake what do I do. Do I go to jail? Get invested by the Secret Service? Basically what I concluded is that I'm out $20 bucks. But then this leads to multiple other thoughts. Why do I get stuck with the bad $20? What about the person I got it from? So in the end for peace of mind I now carry around a countefeit pen and when cashiers hand me money a put a nice little mark on the money and if it turns black...they're busted! I'm calling the cops of them. Citizens On Patrol!

Counterfeit: While on vacation to Mexico I was able to reread two books that made a huge impact when I first read them. The first I read was Through Painted Deserts by Donald Miller. I originally read this book in August 2005 as I began to wrap up ministry at Emmanuel where I was a youth pastor. He talks about the adventure of life and the beauty of leaving home so you can one day return to it. It was an interesting analogy because I was about to return to the home of my youth. The second book I read was Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller. I cracked it open in the airport of Acapulco and by the time we boarded the plane in Atlanta I had 20 short pages to left and was able to finish the book in one travel day. I think that book is best read that way and I was so happy to revisit so many truths that shook my thinking those years ago but removed what seemed to be spiritual scales that were covering my eyes to truth of the universe as well as truth of Christ and his Bride, the church.

I began this thought sometime in our travels home last week and I'll finish it here: The heart, the mind, the whatever you want to call it that sees beauty and feels beauty is created by God. I suppose if we wanted we could reduce it to science and explain that when we see something beautiful like a sunset or a woman a chemical washes over our brains and this stimulation is why beauty is so amazing...but why would be do that? There's no romance in science. "You know baby, as we sit here and gaze at this sunset and as I gaze at your beautiful face I feel the chemicals wash over my brain and...ME LIKEY! So let's make out. Is your brain doing the same thing?"

God created us to experience beauty both the emotion of it as well as the euphoric feeling of it. This is a God given thing and I believe an experience that ultimately draws us into relationship with him. The problem comes when like everything else we begin to meddle and discover we can make a counterfeit experience for ourselves rather than being give and take we can make it all take. As the serpents voice echoes "go ahead and take the fruit and shortcut this relationship with God. If you bite you don't need his wisdom of good and evil you'll know it all-shortcut-shortcut" So we take the shortcut and we meddle and we discover than rather than enjoy a womans beauty in the way God created we experience casual sex or pornography or masturbation (oh crap did he just say the "M" word?) and we shortcut. We create this counterfeit experience that is neither right morally or experientally nor is it how God intended it and with this shortcut comes the briars and the thorns and the scrapes and the scars and the PAIN. Rather than experience the sun and the moon and the trees and the stars as beauty and let the romance and the chemicals wash over our brains we smoke crack and shoot heroin and shortcut and with the shortcut comes the briars and the thorns and the scapes and the PAIN.

Maybe those are two very extreme examples but let that idea trickle down and how often do we shortcut something that God intended and how often to we experience the result of pain? I feel compelled and convicted to stop shortcutting, maybe I've taken care of the "big things" but not the "smaller things" because afterall what good is a counterfeit experience...it's just counterfeit and painful.

Perhaps you thought since I was on vacation last week I would take a little time to relax but no...the mullet search continued.

I found two gems...



The Jerri Curl Mullet



The airport mexi mullet

While we went to Acapulco, Mexico for vacation it was definately a learning experience for me. I have seen poverty before and a little side trip we took into the mountains of Acapulco just reminded me of the oppression of poverty and our responsibility to do something about it.

This is a adorable little girl playing with her toys in the windowsill of a run down store.



There is a half mile stretch from the Pacific ocean to the Lagoon and this wooded trail covers the walk to the lagoon.



From an island looking over Acapulco Bay and onto where our hotel was.



These people are street vendors who come running when they see us rich Americans walk by. I really took the picture because the little boy is wearing a Washington Redskins shirt.



From the inside of a late 60's Volkswagon Bug beside a guy almost as big as me.



The famous cliff divers. They charge 35 pesos to see them or roughly $3.50 american.



Just minutes from the tourist resort where the cliff divers jump was this room filled with trash. It just shows the paradox of the wealth and poverty found in Mexico.



The sun decends taken from our hotel window.



Heather and I on a boat in the lagoon.



This is a little snack bar on the lagoon where we pulled up to get drinks and stretch our legs.



Ice cold refreshing yet blazing hot!



I assume people still walk on this pier but I wasn't testing it.



Little girl sleeping in a hammock while her mom sold stuff to the tourists.



This is a little ghetto of sorts, basically just shacks but if you look closely you'll see the thousands of wires- those are powerlines to the shacks.



The sun breaking through the clouds.

World Cup: I was commenting a few weeks back about soccer and how it gets shunned in th US. At the time I didn’t realize I would be in Mexico so close to the start of the World Cup (June 9). It’s pretty cool here. There are posters and in Wal-Mart (Yes Mexico has wal-mart) there are 20 oz coke bottles in red, white and green. There are world cup soccer balls and other cool stuff. It’s neat to be in a country that loves soccer.

Tacos:: here is a “duh” statement for you. In Mexico there are lots of tacos. But not tacos like we know tacos. Basically a taco here is a layer of corn tortillas about the size of the palm of your hand. Generally a layer is about 6 tortillas and then on top is some meat, depending on what you order. On the side they bring some salsa, and then a variety of small dishes of hot sauces for your tacos. It’s that simple. If you count the meal we ate on Sunday at home and minus the Chic-Fil-A at the airport on Monday I have had Mexican food, tacos to be specific 4 of my last 5 meals. It’s great!

It should be noted that the preceding blogs were written during my travel to and from Mexico as well as while we were there as well. The reason why you are getting these entries about a week late is because there is not a free wifi hotspot to be found in Mexico. I’m not sure if I’ll go back and edit the dates of these so they are posted correctly or if I’ll just let you figure it out.

Listening To: I like to give credit where credit is due especially with bands and speakers that I hear and especially in the church world where bands and speakers get their business through word of mouth. Graham Davis (and his band) played our retreat this year. Musically they were excellent and Graham proved to be not just a music player but an actual worship leader. His heart was evident when he shared with the students and when he played and they took notice and their hearts were moved. It’s amazing when you can end a retreat weekend and see most every kid worshipping from his/her heart.

Did I mention they also rocked! Not all the time, which can get annoying, but at very appropriate time they just rocked out for Jesus. It was great. Graham told me his website was down but when it’s up you can find it at Graham Davis Band.

Horse: I turn on espn last night and there is a big breaking news story about about Barbado which is the horse that won the Kentucky Derby and shattered it’s leg while running the preakness. All in the news and on the front page of what I believe was the New York Times is this horse. The Horse might die. Truth- I don’t give a crap. It’s a horse. If this were a professional athlete that got drilled in the face with a baseball and was near death I would care. If this was a football player that broke his back and might be paralyzed for the rest of his life I would care. But a horse…I don’t care.

It probably made me especially sensitive because I was on my way to Mexico when I was seeing these headlines. Mexico is not the most impoverished country in the world I know there but there is poverty in it’s tourist cities that make 99% of places in the US look like luxury. In the end I was thinking about all the kids in the US and in Mexico that are starving to death or going without medical care that will ultimately lead to their death and there is some horse getting more attention…sick human nature.

Instrument: Tonight I spoke at our district's annual youth retreat. I have been to this retreat 5 times now, 4 as a youth pastor and this year as one of the keynote speakers. I asked our prayer teams to pray for this night for sometime and I asked our church to pray. As Heather and I were talking this afternoon I had such a peace but a peace that was one of power. God was telling me he was going to use me mightily in the student's lives. I wasn't worred about it I was trying I didn't feel like I needed to perform. Basically I felt God say- Nick you are going to be my instrument tonight. As I was experiencing all of this Heather said -Nick I know God is going to use you tonight in an amazing way.

We talked for a while in exciting anticipation of what God was going to do. The night came and I have never been so at peace and comfortable. I wish I could explain it in words but I don't believe I can. It was honestly the feeling an instrument would get if it got feelings. Tonight I was the instrument that made beautiful music and the power was literally the breath of God. This sounds bad but I didn't care. I didn't care if one kid was impacted because I was the instrument of God. It was amazing, possibly one of the most amazing experiences as a public speaker. It wasn't about me, not about me at all!

Facedown



Purpose Driven Cafe

We're on the Web: I almost forgot. We're on the web- www.suffolk-bridge.org or The Bridge Church

World Cup: First a little history. I played soccer growing up. I played soccer when people didn't play soccer. Soccer was the sport that kids played because their parent's didn't want them to get hurt playing football. I'm guess I played soccer because in Football you have to play according to your weight class. Probably good thing I didn't play football or as a 10 year old I would have been playing with 18 year olds. As I grew up I really loved soccer but to other kids it just wasn't football.

Then in the past 10 years or so with soccer gaining popularity and the beginning of a Major League Soccer and the women doing so well in the World Cup (winning it all 2 times in the last 4 cups and finishing in the top 3 in all of them) soccer is a little more respectable.

I was pleased to see that ESPN is going to cover the games that will go on for a month starting June 9. The U.S. is ranked 4th in the world. You won't grasp that magnitude of that ranking but let's just say it's amazing. So consider this my plug for World Cup soccer, the rest of the world goes crazy and as for me any my house we will join the PANDEMONIUM!

Eavesdropping: I find it funny that that word makes perfect sense but we probably don't catch it most of the time. Eaves- the place where the roof overhangs the wall of the house. I guess back in the old days people would stand under the eaves and listen in on conversations in the house. I also find it funny that right now I'm listening in on a conversation between a pastor and his youth pastor. I happen to know the pastor and as of 5 minutes ago I met the youth pastor. They're both nice guys and their church is in full support of the Bridge and have even supplied us some great resources, I like them a ton. But now as I listen in to this conversation the YP is kind of getting chewed out as much as can happen in Starbucks but what I'm hearing is griping. Basically the gripe is feeding the sheep. Feeding the sheep is dangerous business because sheep get fickle and then they bit you. The irony of it all is that sheep can feed themselves.

My Jesus: I'm a big fan of Rich Mullins and Derek Webb. Rich Mullins because he was willing to sing songs about Jesus in a blunt and honest fashion that could have been controversial, and I'm sure in his time they were. I like Derek Webb for the same reason but where Rich Mullins sang about Christ, Derek Webb sings about the church in a beautiful, blunt, controversial fashion. And on that same note Todd Agnew has a new song out called My Jesus. It's actually been out a few months and if you listen to Christian radio you've probably heard it and if you haven't...check it out!